It's 1 year already....

At the same time, same day last year, I was lying in the delivery ward bed, finally being relieved of contraction pains after the epidural was given. Glenn and I still had no idea how our baby look like, or what kind of person he is.

It's now 11.16pm and there's a downpour. It's just so apt. Like God giving me memory triggers for that fateful evening when I was ordered to check myself into the delivery ward. It was pouring then too, & Glenn had initially gone to the carpark to head home for his clothes. But I just wanted him to be around so I asked him - almost pleaded - that he remain and let his brother get the clothes. I was unsure and unprepared for that new experience awaiting me in the imposing ward.

The 3 days in hospital with my newborn, it had rained every morning too, like God cleansing each day at dawn so that it's fresh and sprightly, just like my new born in his first few days. I just love it.

In about 8 more hours Ian will turn ONE. Our very first child, the one who would set the stage for the rest of his siblings, who would give us an idea of how the other children will look like, is reaching his 1 year. At this moment I just think back on those pregnant days with that heady mix of anticipation and fears, leading to the memorable delivery and first few days, leading to the slowburn joy of watching him grow. I'm so grateful and it means so much to me that the journey to ONE has been always happy and safe and smooth. The sweaty moments, the poo leaking out and all, even those were blissful on hindsight.

In a few hours' time, the one with the biggest burst of emotions will be me. Because I am his mummy, the one who felt it all from Week 5 to Week 38, followed by Day 1 to Day 365. On his behalf, I will rejoice and celebrate his birthday as Ian, as his parent, and most of all, as the proud mummy of this beloved boy who turned out to be everything we asked God for, and more.

Happy birthday, beloved. I wish you years of blessedness and of health, and of knowing how much you are loved by Jesus.